Taking Our Insults to God, Not Into Our Hearts
Nehemiah 4:4-5; Romans 12:19
Picture the builders up on the wall. The mortar is still wet on their hands. And they hear the voices of Sanballat and Tobiah saying things about them. Not words covertly whispered behind their backs. These guys want to be heard. They use the word “feeble” and imply their work is shoddy and couldn’t withstand the tender gait of a fox upon it. It’s not just criticism. The jibes are meant to drive the workers to give up.
Most of us grew up hearing some version of “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Some may be more familiar with the radio-friendly version of the saying: “Shake It Off.” No matter how it’s worded, the implication behind it is that they’re “only words,” chasing a kind of toughness of character that dismisses what others think. There’s some wisdom there, but also a falsehood. Words do hurt. Even if we can say our feelings are intact, words can drive us to anger or frustration, which still cause pain.
Nehemiah doesn’t pretend otherwise. He doesn’t shake this off. He doesn’t act like it doesn’t bother him. But he also doesn’t do what comes naturally to so many of us. We either turn it inward, and it becomes anxiety or shame, or we turn it outward, and it becomes a retort or aggression. But not Nehemiah. Here, Nehemiah turns it upward. He never answers Sanballat directly. He never organizes a comeback. He doesn’t launch into a diatribe to defend the wall’s construction or the quality of the work they’re doing. He’s clearly bothered by what they’re saying, and the hurt goes somewhere, but it isn’t sideways, and it isn’t buried. It goes up.
In verse four he prays, “Hear, O our God, for we are despised.” There’s no performance of being unbothered. Paul picks up that same instinct centuries later in Romans 12:19, echoing a line that goes all the way back to Deuteronomy: “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” Paul isn’t telling anyone to pretend the offense didn’t happen. He’s telling them where to put it. Leave room for God’s judgment, rather than carrying the case yourself.
That’s a hard word for someone like me who likes the “last word.” Other times, I’d rather skip past the hurt and call it forgiveness—but it’s still there, and really it’s conflict avoidance wearing forgiveness’s clothes. Nehemiah doesn’t skip past anything. He names it, hands it over, and only then goes back to work. Nehemiah and Paul are standing on the same ground. Neither one denies the wound. Both hand the verdict to God, and both trust that God will be just.
Another thing we can consider is that Sanballat and Tobiah wanted the builders distracted. Discouraged. They’d have been overjoyed to see the workers off the wall and arguing instead of working. That’s usually what mockery like this is built to do. It doesn’t need to win an argument. It exists to distract you long enough for the work to stall. Nehemiah seems to know exactly what’s being aimed at him, and he doesn’t give it that power. He hands the insult to God, and picks the trowel back up.
Not every criticism deserves an answer. Some of it is simply better carried to God first—not inward, not outward, but upward, so the work can go on.
Question to Consider
What criticism or distraction have you been carrying lately, and what has holding onto it cost you in attention or peace?
Prayer Prompt
Prayer for the willingness to leave the verdict with God.
