Recently, a friend shared in a meeting about their miscarriage and how they struggled with God afterwards.
Almost in passing, I mentioned how wonderful the gospel is because as a result of the death and resurrection of Jesus and His promise of eternal life there will be a great reunion one day between mothers and their miscarried children.
After the meeting, I received a question via email: “Something you said threw me for a bit of a loop: It’s been a long time since I thought about whether I’d see my unborn baby in heaven. You seemed sure that I will.
When I had the miscarriage, we weren’t that strong in any church… So we didn’t have any spiritual conversations with anyone back then. Anyway, since you said that… I haven’t been able to stop thinking about whether I might see my baby in heaven. I wonder why you’re so sure.”
Here’s how I answered my friend:
Maryanne had a miscarriage when we were in seminary. Alan and Joanna had a miscarriage before Ethan was born. So, it has hit close to home for us. Twice.
While in seminary, we read a book called Free to Grieve by Maureen Rank. It really helped.
In my view, the loss is a very real loss of a very real life. Since life begins at conception then the life lost at a miscarriage is to be seen in the same way we would see the death of a full-term baby, an infant, or a young child. And the eternal state of a miscarried child would be the same as the eternal state of a full-term baby, an infant, or a young child
I have officiated at several funerals for babies over the years. I believe we can apply the truth that David expressed when his 1st child with Bathsheba died. “He cannot come to me, but I will go to him.” The implication seems clear to me that David believed that he would join his infant child in heaven one day.
Here are a few posts from Randy Alcorn’s Eternal Perspective Ministries that might be helpful for you.
- What hope can be found in the midst of a miscarriage?
- Will we be reunited with children who have died too young to believe in Christ?
- The Need for Pro-lifers to Be Consistent When It Comes to Miscarriage
Thank God for the gospel! There is hope for us when we suffer loss like miscarriage.